penguin on board

Ok so I am getting ready to leave for my much-needed vacation to the Bahamas on the cruise I won last year. Last night I dreamed that we got there, and there was a FREAK blizzard and about 4' of snow was everywhere, oh yeah and there was a penguin running loose on the ship. Hmm let's hope that doesn't come true, except for the penguin part, that would totally rule. Anyway I leave tomorrow morning and will be back the following Saturday night. Hopefully with a lot more freckles and a lot of happy memories. What happens in Bahamas stays there right?
Someone posted this on myspace and I had to share it, because I REALLY relate to it....enjoy.

Ex Dictionary A is for the automobile which he doesn't own. B is also for brain, which was located between his legs. C is for the commitment that was never there. D is for the dildo he didn't know I had. E is for ego. His was bigger than a hot air balloon. F is for his faithfulness, as long as there wasn't something or someone better to do. G is also for the spot he could never find! H is for laughter (HA! HA!) the last sound he heard from me as he was walking out the door. I is for impotent which is what I told everyone he was. J is for jugular, the one I'd love to sever. K is for kinky, he always started without me. L is for love in most cases, but exceptions have been made, L is for LOSER in this case, along with LUSH and LITTLE DICK. M is for MAN. Has anyone been able to find one? Have you ever met one? Do you know where any are? N is for the narcotics. He drove me past alcohol. O is for the orgasms he thought he made me have. P is for PAYBACKS. Remember they are HELL! Q is for queer. I sometimes wonder if he is. R is for the hopeless romantic he said he was. He was half right. He was hopeless, not to mention worthless. S is also for satisfied, which he rarely made me feel. T is for typical. Typical little boy playing at being a man. U is also for the ugly girl he is dating now. V is for the voodoo doll I made of him. W is for wife, the one he said he didn't have. X is what he is to me now!!!! Y is for WHY the hell did I ever get involved with him. Z isn't for anything, just like him, he ain't anything either.