Friday, October 30, 2009

long freakin survey

Finish this sentence: The last person I kissed is...
Buttons -on the ear ok he's not a "person" but screw you, survey, I dont feel like going "there" tonight

Would you be surprised if your most recent ex called you tonight?
yes I'd die of shock cause he never called me when we were together! ROFL

Honestly, who was the last person to tell you that they love you?
Alex

Did you sleep alone last night?
no, there was a pooh bear in there

This time last year, can you remember who you liked?
Hmm I think I was between men at that time... why am I ALWAYS SINGLE AT CHRISTMAS!?! *must find man NOW*

Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?
don't they have something better to do? ffs

The last person you kissed, how many times have you cried in front of them?
Buttons has seen me cry more times than I can count

Next time will you kiss someone on the lips?
the lips? i am not sure :P

Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?
Alex is here and she will be asking for bacon at 9am. dammit

Do you find piercings attractive?
let me see them

Who was the last person you talked to in person?
Alex

What were you doing last night at midnight?
trying to shove an 85 lb child off my side of the bed

Lets start with the personals okay?
I don't want to put an ad in the personals!

Waiting for something?
life

Last December, what was your love life like?
I had just started having feelings for a good friend..

Do you have a job?
is your hamster depressed? send him to me.

Your phone is ringing. It's your ex. What do you say?
which one? Well logically speaking its probably Jamie as he calls here 100x per day.. so I throw Alex the phone and mutter a few curse words

When you trip, do you get embarrassed or just play it off?
I scream "DAMN YOU, GRAVITY!!!!!!!!" and shake my fist at the earth

Did you lose friends when you started dating your most recent ex?
almost

You kissed someone last night, didn't you?
that wasn't me.

What's so special about what you're wearing?
my electric pants? they keep me from having thoughts. I was ordered to wear them by law.

If you had to choose one: strawberries or grapes?
Strawberries

Did you reject or accept your last friend request?
I always accept, then they delete me

Do you have a favorite number?
19

Who is your last received call from?
Andrea to tell me about her Target shopping nightmare on Halloween Eve

Do you think the last person you kissed cares for you?
Buttons could take me or leave me, really. Hes a cat.

Is tomorrow going to be a good day?
FUCK I hope so

Would you hug the last person you hugged again?
They filed a restraining order.

Do you still talk to the last person you kissed?
yes but they don't listen

Are you wearing something you borrowed from someone?
no. ewwwww

What is the last thing someone bought you?
jason bought me a toothbrush.. rofl. and you said romance was dead!

Who was the last person you talked to last night before bed?
Alex

Have you made a mistake this past week?
yes.. not turning my phone off Monday night

Do you drink tea?
occasionally

When was the last time you really laughed?
The day me and Andrea went walking... I got tickled telling her about my eHarmony rejection experience...

I'll bet you miss someone right now?
several people..

Who is the last person you high-fived?
my gynecologist

Was yesterday better than today?
who cares!

Where was your default photo taken?
south park graveyard

Are you easily amused?
usually, but probably not the past month or so

Does the last person who put their arm around you mean anything to you?
I have no clue who that was

Do you miss your past?
I miss my 17 yr old body..

Are there any people who don't like you?
oh yes... i'm difficult to love and easy to hate

Who knows you the best?
a couple of people :-)

Does anyone call you babe or baby?
not in person

What will you be doing tomorrow?
going to a halloween party dressed as a kitty

Be honest, who are you texting?
no one right this second, but I've sent texts to four diff people today :-)

Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
come on baby let me know

Who was the first person you talked to today?
my priest

You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life, what is it?
water

Are you anything like you were at this point last year?
unfortunately I am in the same situation again... :-( waaaaaaaaaaa

Do you think you are a good person?
I am, but apparently I was horrid in my previous life

Are you a patient person?
NOOOOO I'm about to lose my mind just filling out this thing!

Do you think you can last in a relationship for 3 months?
Yes if I could get in one

Think a lot before you fall asleep?
No thinking is BAD

Do you care what others think about you?
only certain ones

Do you enjoy late night phone conversations?
hahahaha I can't even remember the last time I had one!

Were you happy when you woke up today?
Yes I was..

What are you excited for?
the future

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
Forcing Alex to take a bath

Honestly, who was the last person to tell you that they love you?
Alex..

Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothes?
most of my ex's were smaller than me..lol

What is something you really want right now?
what i was emailing about earlier. LMAO

Are you wearing any makeup right now?
yes

Do you have any saved texts?
Yes and I haven't the heart to delete them yet...

Are you someone's best friend?
I hope I'm not their worst

Last time you wore a dress?
ROFL

Do you enjoy summer?
yeah except pool maintenance.. *must find pool man/bf*

Do you eat ranch with your pizza?
I rarely eat pizza..trying to reduce circumference of ass..

What do you currently hear?
Buttons wailing at something outside the window..

Is your hair curly or straight?
in between, just enough to be a pain

Who did you last go out to eat with?
Andrea and the kids

Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yes

Have you ever broken someones heart?
I hope not

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
YES

Have you ever gotten a teddy bear from a girlfriend/boyfriend?
yes lol... awwwww

Have you kissed anyone whose name starts with a J?
who me?? LMAO perhaps

Where would you rather live, England or Italy?
ENGLAND but visit Italy sometimes?

What would be the first thing you would do with 100,000 dollars?
pay off my bills, and plan a trip

Are you addicted to cigarettes?
NO

What woke you up this morning?
SAM 105.1

Who was your last outgoing call to?
Alex

Would you ever get someones name tattooed on you?
Only if I wanted the relationship to end.

What are you supposed to be doing right now?
I was supposed to work out and clean tonight.. oops

Are you the type of person who likes to be out or home?
I'm a homebody but I do like to go out once in awhile

Do you know how to work a computer well?
Yes

Are you happier now than you were three months ago?
No

Do you like to hold hands?
Yes

Is there anybody you just wish would fall off the planet?
JAMIE

How was your day overall?
it was erotically charged but lacked reality

Do you think about your life in a different way now then you did a year ago?
I suppose I am a bit more realistic about it :-(

Have you done anything embarrassing lately?
always

Have you ever received a homemade card from someone?
Alex's cards are one of a kind lol

When will your next kiss take place?
I have no clue..

Has anyone said they love you in the last week?
Alex..

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?
No

Any up coming events you're excited about?
Partay tomorrow night

What's your plans for Friday?
Nothing

Do you curse in front of your parents?
Yes they are dead and don't care

Anything make you smile today?
dirty emails LOL

Someone tells you that you're beautiful, you say?
time to visit the optometrist

Where did you get the pants you're wearing?
I bought them at Target

Would you rather text or use MSN?
Text

What are you doing other than this survey?
yawning and wondering if it will ever end!

Do you shop at Aeropostale?
No I'm a fat ass

Do you apologize?
yes even when I'm not sorry! Its a sickness!

Do you believe in forever?
Nothing lasts forever

When was the last time it rained?
all week it seemed like

Where do you want to live when you are old?
in the arms of a righteous man who loves me

How many piercings have you had in your life?
three (ears)

Would you go in public looking like you do right now?
sure. but i might get arrested

Do you like where you live?
NO

How's your sister?
Don't get me started on her tonight...

Have you ever made someone so mad that they broke something?
Yes Jamie was always throwing shit and breaking stuff and busting holes in the walls..

Tell us the truth, what made you start liking the person you like now?
the photos.

Are you afraid of losing the last person you talked to?
yep

Where is your biological mother right now?
dead

Let's test your memory, what were you doing at this moment a year ago?
filling out a survey and feeling desperately alone.. what a coincidence!

Have you ever held hands with the opposite sex?
not hands.

Do you smoke weed everyday?
I try to but sometimes life gets in the way.

When was the last time you went to the circus?
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

What is bothering you right now?
lack of men in my bedroom

Have you ever liked someone older than you?
it happens sometimes

When was the last time a person of the opposite sex hugged you?
September 2

Is good vocabulary attractive?
it sho is

Is there anyone you'd die for in order to save their life?
Yeah

Do you think that crying is a form of weakness?
No, it just means you have emotions.. although I have cried enough to last several lifetimes.. i'm sick of it

Who regularly makes appearances in your dreams?
Alex asking for bacon

What's your mood?
tired

What were you doing when you found out Michael Jackson was dead?
cleaning the pool, jason texted me.

What does the last text in your inbox say?
mmmmm yes is right

If you found out that you were going to be a parent, what would you do?
Wheres some rope, a gun, a razor??????????

Do you currently have a crush on someone? Or any feelings at all?
yes and yes

What would you do if you walked in on your bestfriend having sex?
I'd say WOO HOO GET YOU SOME

Could you forgive your bestfriend for sleeping with your bf/gf?
I dont know..I wouldn't forgive my bf

What do you miss most about the past?
all the sex

Do you like country music?
Not really although I do like the Dixie Chicks

Did you kiss anyone this summer?
Yes

Are you cocky?
cooky

Are you listening to music right now?
only in my head

Is any part of you sad at all?
yes :-(

Do you miss someone right now?
see above

Could you go the rest of your life without doing any drugs?
No!!!!! must have drugs!! lmao

Which friend are you most similiar to?
Jilly and I seem to have a lot in common.. but then Jaimy and I share a brain....oh this is tough..

You win backstage passes to meet the Jonas Brothers, you...?
SELL them

Sunday, October 11, 2009

thaw

thaw
For a long time now I've been following you
but with every step that I grow closer,
you take two steps away...
I can't see what is in your mind, nor your heart, and so
I fumble along blindly
hoping to catch up with you,
and fall into your elusive embrace..

Hopelessness has spread across my heart...
from the hidden corners where I kept it tucked away,
it grew and grew,
fed by the daily diet of despair
and now has engulfed me in its icy grip..
winter has set in and the fiery embers have long been extinguished,
but I cannot seem to stop trying
to generate warmth from the ashes left behind...

I watch you walk on ahead down this same old path, and I pause for a moment
catching my reflection in a stream,
the misery etched upon my face from years
upon years
of longing...

I see another road ahead,
veering off into the unknown
and I head towards it eagerly...
as the rising sun spreads its warmth across my face
and thaws my frozen soul