Friday, May 20, 2005

pikachu doesn't like washing dishes

Life sucks.
Shamelessly stolen from The Tale of Smith.

Song for the Day: If You Were Gay– Avenue Q

Quote of the Day: The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree. Steven Wright. Sorry I just can't get enough Steven Wright.

Fun Links of the Day:
Silk’s post about fondling chickens online- priceless.
Store wars
Music Video thanks to Lauren

Local News:
Well Lauren was in a program at school last night, all about how much these kids LOVE America. It was so patriotic I cried. Oh wait nm I was crying cause I was sitting on a wooden bleacher for an hour listening to elementary kids singing. Seriously though Lauren’s class did very well and I was proud. I am planning to go to see Star Wars on Saturday. I think we might go to the early matinee, since 1) its probably less crowded and 2) it’s a lot cheaper. I am also eagerly awaiting my netflix shipment of In Good Company (I heart Topher Grace) and The Life Aquatic (I heart Bill Murray). Also in addition to the really bad movies we watched recently that I mentioned in an earlier post, we also watched Blade Trinity which was very good, mostly thanks to Ryan Reynolds who is 1)very hot 2)likes to take off his shirt a lot 3) has a super mega fantastic bod and 4) he is so freaking funny.

Fun Stuff I Shamelessly Purloined off the Net:

Note: I did not write this so don't shoot me.

A woman walks into the downtown welfare office, trailed by 15 kids... "WOW," the social worker exclaims, are they ALL YOURS???"

"Yep they are all mine," the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before. Then she says, "Sit down Leroy." All the children rush to find seats."Well," says the social worker, "then you must be here to sign up. I'll need all your children's names." "This one's my oldest - he is Leroy." "OK, and who's next?" "Well, this one he is Leroy, also."The social worker raises an eyebrow but continues. One by one, through the oldest four, all boys, all named Leroy. Then she is introduced to the eldest girl, named Leighroy! "All right," says the caseworker. "I'm seeing a pattern here. Are they ALL named Leroy?" Their Momma replied, "Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it is time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, 'Leroy!' An' when it's time, for dinner, I just yell 'Leroy!' an' they all come a-runnin. An' if I need to stop the kid who's running into the street, I just yell 'Leroy' and! all of them stop. It's the smartest idea I ever had, namin' them all Leroy." The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, "But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?"
"I call them by their last names."

Ever Wondered?

Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 a piece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards. Haha I happen to love Evian myself..

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does that make the Tennessee Titans ?

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?