Friday, November 19, 2004

A new beginning...

James and I are back together again, giving it one more try (for the what is it now, 5th time?). I have said some pretty harsh things on here about him (which I have now deleted along with all hostile remarks) and I just found out that his family read them. Well I want to apologize. I really care about his family,and I really didn't mean most of the things I said about James, I was hurt, angry and alone and thought that he had moved on seemingly effortlessly. He had said to me "the whole point of breaking up is for you to leave me the hell alone". Surely anyone would have been mad as hell! I hope they understand that I am really not a nasty person. But I do get fierce when I've been wronged. James is going to try his best to resolve his communication issues, and I am going to stop being a vengeful bitch. Just kidding, I am going to work on SELF ESTEEM issues, which are currently at an all time low, practically non-existent to be honest. I know that he really loves me a great deal, and I really hope that it will last more than 6 months this time (sigh) although the making up part is quite fun. Margaret and Randall can now breathe a sigh of relief, they sure have been put to the friendship test the last 2 yrs.
Boots is feeling better, Mojo is laid back as usual and Moonpie is looking for something to eat. Lauren is glued to her computer, I think I saw a cobweb between her hand and the mouse. Alex has been SPASTIC today, I had to keep her at the office because Laraine went to Temple (some kind of Mormon thing). She marked on the walls, spilled ice cream all over the desk, and since we got home, she has been acting as though she was possessed by some demonic beast hellbent on destroying my will to live. She has calmed down for the moment and the reddish glow in her eyes has died down. I cannot wait to take a hot bubble bath, get her to SLEEP, and get some MASSIVE loving. Yes its cuddling time tonight. James said he wanted to go see Bridget Jones with me in Havelock tomorrow night, I'm not sure if Lauren wants to go, she's still angry with him but assuming he's going to buy her a present, she might decide to endure his presence a few hours. Bribery is the key to a teenagers love. Or at least its the only way I can get her to move from the computer desk.