xmas survey

1.

Wrapping paper or gift bags?
I photocopy my butt, and print out tons of copies. Makes great wrapping paper.


2.

Real tree or Artificial?
Real trees make me sad. Trees should be growing in the ground. Not chopped down for amusement.
*cries*


3.

When do you put up the tree?
Usually right after Thanksgiving.


5.

Do you like eggnog?
Not really but if it is mostly rum then yes


6.

Favorite gift received as a child?
Hmmm easy bake or lite brite?


7.

Hardest person to buy for?
I need a 2nd job to provide Lauren with the gifts she wants. That child is killing me.



8.

Easiest person to buy for?
Me. Lush. Lush. More Lush.



9.

Do you have a nativity scene?
Its like a barnyard in here, yes.


10.

Mail or email Christmas cards?
I hand deliver the cards, and you have to find them somewhere on my body.



11.
Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
panties from the fat old neighbor man.. creepy


12.

Favorite Christmas Movie?
Love Actually or The Holiday, or Serendipity... omg there are so many good ones!

13.

When do you start shopping for Christmas?
November


14.

Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
No, that is too risky. You could give someone something that they gave you! the horror.



15.

Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
I make the most amazing popcorn balls.



16.
Lights on the tree?
they're purdy


17.

Favorite Christmas song?
Swiss Colony Beef Log- Cartman



18.

Travel at Christmas or stay home?
Stay home but I WISH I was traveling somewhere else!


19.

Can you name all of Santa's reindeer's?
of course

20.

Angel on the tree top or a star?
star



21.

Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Christmas Eve


22.

Most annoying thing about this time of the
year?
Being single definitely sucks this time of year. And this will be my 3rd year... I really miss having someone around to cuddle and love, and who will put crap together for me.



23.

Favorite ornament theme or color?
I tend to love blue decorations on the tree....and blue or white lights.



24.

Favorite for Christmas dinner?
a hot man dipped in gravy

25.

What do you want for Christmas this year?
a righteous intelligent funny man who adores me


26.

What will you do this Christmas?
sit home and cry and probably drunk dial my ex's

Morbid Survey - ala Tristram

{1} do you ever see garbage bags on the side of the highway and wonder if there are body parts inside?
OMG YES! So I pull over and make sure the trunk is closed and none have fallen out.



{2} if you ever got the chance to practice cannibalism, would you?
rofl my brain is overcome with all the sexual innuendo that this question creates!


{3} if forced to overdose on a drug, which one would you choose?
Ecstacy. It sounds nice doesnt it.



{WOULD YOU RATHER BE...}


{4} shot or stabbed?
you have been shot and stabbed, Tristram? I want to hear that story.

I want to die of spontaneous combustion or just explode for no reason. Its more fun when its unplanned and unexpected.



{5} asphixiated or exanguinated?
Hmmm erotic asphyxiation sounds fun.




{6} drowned or buried alive?
Buried alive. I have a fear of drowning....plus like tristram said theres a chance you could escape.
Remember in Kill Bill?


{7} killed by blunt-force trauma to the head or crushed to death?
Both sound like a fun weekend at fat camp.



{8} poisoned or overdosed?
overdosed on something good


{9} killed by a flesh-melting virus or by rats or ants slowly pecking at you?
oh FFS I think I would just kill myself by pulling my head off.



{10} out of all the above choices, which one do you like best?
sex at fat camp


{11}...which is the worst way to die in your opinion?
cancer


{12} killed (by a person) intentionally, or by accident?
if someone has killed me intentionally it means I have obviously done something really bad and pissed someone off... so I pick that one.



{13} killed by a serial killer (for pleasure) or a hitman (for profit)?
Hitman....its just so mundane to be killed by a serial killer.



{14} killed in a car crash or a plane crash?
this survey is making me want to go hide in my bathtub in the fetal position

{15} killed in your home or away from home?
in my home so I can haunt the kids after


{16} killed in your sleep or while watching TV?
Someone kill me if I am watching the Disney Channel


{17} killed by someone who knew you, a stalker, or a complete stranger?
someone I know...then I know where to find them so I can haunt them



{RANDOM...}


{18} what do you want done with your body when you die?
lmfao @ Tristrams answer... I want my ashes scattered on a large gathering of righteous burly scruffy men...

{19} you're forced to have your funeral at a place OTHER than a church - where would you choose?
My bathroom

{20} what song/s would you want played at your funeral?
Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

{21} what outfit would you like to be buried in?
my mashmallow costume is appropo for the cremation


{22} who do you want to give your eulogy?
Steve Martin

{23} any other specifics about your funeral you'd like to share?
you're all invited. Bring a stick and some kerosene.



{24} would you rather be forgotten about when you die, or remembered but hated?
remembered but hated.. and I am on the right path.



{25} would you rather die alone, or die loved but leave a heartbroken mate
behind?
Lets face it, I will die alone and be eaten by my cats. By the time they discover the body, Buttons will weigh 50 lbs, and there will be nothing left but my head.

NAUGHTY BULLETIN ALA PAM

Would you like to learn how to pole dance? I'm getting lessons from Sue


Ever been to an adult store? quite possibly


Ever bought something from an adult store? Roger.



Ever played strip poker? yes its a family tradition at Christmas


Ever gone skinny dipping? of course.
I'm a southern girl


Kissed someone of the same sex? not french, but its on my to do list.



Sex in the morning, afternoon, or night? yes please


Are you dominant or submissive? whatever you want, baby.
:P that was submissive wasnt it


Would you have sex with anyone on your Top friends? why of course, from number 2 up, they are in order of fuckability


What is the weirdest place you've had sex? a goat farm in Zimbabwe, but not with goats.



Ever been to a strip club? No my husband never let me go with him, I wonder why... *rolls eyes*


Called someone the wrong name durring sex? No I just always say OH GOD YES... they seem to like that.



Do you believe in make-up sex? Yes in fact I doubt anyone would fuck me if I wasnt wearing makeup


Ever had a one night stand? Once or twice, I prefer to call them rentals...not worth a 2nd try


Has anyone ever used alcohol to lower your resistance? I prefer weed. If you have any, call me.



Ever used alcohol to lower someones resistance? Chilli. He passed out.



Ever been cheated on? yep.
I've dated a long line of losers


Ever cheated on someone? NEVER


Drunken Nights
Are you a light weight? yes I rarely drink


How many drinks til your drunk? 2 lol


What is your favorite beer? blech.



What is your favorite mixed drink? Sunset pina colada

What is your favorite shot? buttery nipple


Do prefer to drink alone or socially? SOCIALLY.. drinking alone is sad isnt it? *hides bottle*


Ever passed out from drinking? yes... ahhh college years.. remember those, John?


Ever thrown up from drinking? who hasnt??


Ever been carried by someone else because of your drunkenness? Just once and I weighed a lot less... he was a burly coast guard friend of my husbands....*sigh*


Ever carried someone because of their drunkenness? Alex. Gotta love that Robitussin.




Have you ever had sex...
On a kitchen table? not at my house.



In the rain? puts on to do list


In a police car? I've slept with a policeman though


In front of a video camera? that was not me... I have an evil twin


In a public place? hmmm yes


Over a sink? no


In a car? yes ... ahh memories of the firebird


In a theater? not yet, *adds to list*


With the same sex? not yet but if I dont find a worthy man soon...


On the first date? yeah this was one of those 'rentals' i mentioned


On the beach? No.. geez I feel so tame now


Pick One
Lights on or off? candles


Pink or Black? depends what you are referring to


Sweet or Spicy? SPICY

Lace or Leather? silk please


Hugs or Kisses? long deep slow wet kisses


Fast or Slow? slow, then faster, faster, slow, fast, slow, fast, yes yes yes


Hard or Soft? hard


Give or Recieve? simultaneous


Love or Lust? Lust. I have given up on love.

SATURDAY MORNING GETTING BORED SURVEY TIME~

Do you hide when Jehovah witnesses knock on your door?
No I welcome them into the muffin lair.
10 seconds later they run out screaming

Tell me about your dancing style?
Chaotic. Absurd. Deadly.


Do you have any family traditions?
Insanity

Honestly, do you laugh when people trip for no reason?
Not unless I was the one tripping them

What is your most used cuss word?
how the fuck do i know

Do you think it looks silly when people wear socks with sandals?
are you saying you dont like my "rainbow-socks-with-toes and flip flops" look?

How many speeding tickets have you talked your way out of?
I do not have a good rapport with cops

If you wake up late, is the rest of your day ruined?
not on weekends

Which side of the bed do you sleep on?
left

When you bend over, can you touch your toes?
I can put my palms flat on the ground behind my legs... I am bendy *winks*

What kind of drunk are you?
aggressively passionate

What is the most difficult thing you've ever had to overcome?
the size of my ass

How do you feel about rainy days?
they are great if I am lying in bed

Do you think that people mistake your kindness for a weakness?
haha they only make that mistake once
"SILENCE, PRISONERS!"

Do you know anyone who is a pathological liar?
my ex bf

What about bi-polar?
Well I have friends with vacation homes on opposite ends of the planet... and I do know a sexually confused bear as well.


Is there anyone you know that deserves to get bitch slapped?
Jason aka Phil. But not today, his shoulder hurts.


Why do people drive slow in the fast lane?
to torment me

What is something interesting your best friend would tell us about you?
its all about her, so doubtful.
:P

Would you rather be a porn star or a prostitute?
very funny... you know I'm already a porn star ;-)

Would you rather have cookies and milk or crackers and juice?
funny brownies and a righteous man

Have you ever missed someones hand in a high five?
that was totally intentional

Favorite candy bar?
chick a stick

friday nite from paul the survey KING!

Do you go to the bathroom with the door open or closed?
I have a groovy purple curtain... no door. And an 8 yr old who walks in at inappropriate moments.... "let mommy shave her cootchie, alex"

Are your underwear and socks folded in your drawer or just thrown in?
underwear thrown in, socks are paired up but not folded...I am not anal... well not about socks :P

Sleep on your back or stomach?
side

Are you a cuddler?
for a little while, then fuck off I want to sleep

What would I find if I looked UNDER your bed?
floor, under that concrete, below that dirt, and beneath that, the bones of those who angered me.


Something that happened today that made you angry?
I was in a great mood today all day long... OMG

What were you doing before this survey
shaving my cootchie.


What will you do after the survey?
ummm...relieve tension

Marriage or living together?
can he come over three times a week and then leave me the fuck alone the rest of the time?? yes.


What shirt are you wearing now?
a pajama top its purple with little flowers.


Do you sing?
all the fucking time. Seriously its really fun in a crowded elevator.


Do you de-label your beer bottles?
I dont drink beer... but I delabel all my clothing so that they can all hang together in perfect harmony.


Do you talk about your feelings or hide them?
bury them 40' underground in a locked box made of impenetrable steel

Is there something you regret and wish you could take back?
I've already tried to return my kids. No go.


First thing you do when you wake up?
Express anger at whoever invented time. Then I praise the person who invented the snooze button.


Ever had surgery?
Not yet but I am on the list.


Last argument you got into with?
Fred. He said I was delusional. The nerve.


Do you tend to rip the paper off water bottles?
What is the obsession with ripping paper off bottles. Can I rip the clothes off a righteous man instead... with my teeth?

What's one good thing about your best friend?
She lives far away.


How long does it take for you to fall asleep at night?
22 minutes, 15 seconds.


Current song on myspace?
there are a bunch on there.


When you shut off your alarm clock, do you tend to fall back asleep?
When I hit snooze I do... I don't turn it OFF until I know for sure I am really awake...unfortunately I am never really sure of that.


If you were given the chance to take care of a monkey for a weekend, would you?
I already do that.


What is the current advertisement on the side of the screen?
Budget rent a car. Wow I can't believe its not about plus size singles who are over 40 and lookin 4 luv.


What are you looking forward to in the next few months?
SEX

Who are you texting?
Nobody texts me anymore since I deleted Neale... LOL oh well at least I don't have to worry about going over my 1000 free texts anymore...whew.


It's Wednesday afternoon, where are you usually?
In Guatemala overseeing the harvest.


Honestly, if you could have ANYONE in the world, who would it be?
Someone who is awesome, sexy, funny, independent, secure, fabulous in bed, has teeth, who loves me and all my pets/kids. :P Yeah I know, he don't exist.


Your Christmas list consists of?
SEX and lush bath products.


You're going to New York for school shopping, where do you go first?
Fuck that if I go to New York I am going to see a bunch of shows and sightsee. If I need school supplies, theres Target.


You need a new pair of jeans, what store do you go to first?
Fat Ass by Wide Load available exclusively at Kmart (formerly the Delta Burke collection)

How do you feel about your hair?
its luxuriously thick and silky and I wish it was tickling a righteous man in naughty places.


What movie is in your DVD player?
HELP! Alex was watchin it

If you could move away, no questions asked, where would you move?
England

How much do looks matter to you in a guy/girl?
If you have seen my ex's you know that looks mean nothing to me.


What's the greatest thing that happened to you today?
I felt overjoyed to be alive all day!

How many TRUE best friends do you have?
I trust NO ONE. Except Fred.


What would you change about your life right now?
less pet excrement, more sex.


What’s the best feeling in the world?
cashmere, or hot steamy animalistic muffin sex. I can never decide.

thanks Paul the Survey King

Can you honestly say that things are running smoothly for you?
well if you expect nothing good, then you are never disappointed.
:S

You see a shooting star, do you make a wish?​​​​​​​
First, I want to find that mother fucker.


Why is your Myspace song what it is?
Watching the Wheels... its how I feel. I am always sitting back watching everyone else live their lives...I'm a spectator at the moment rather than a participator...I keep hoping I will get the urge to stand up and jump into the crowd ...

Are you a big fan of snowstorms or thunderstorms?
YES!!!!!!!!! Especially if I am home, tucked in bed.
:-)

Think​ back to your last hug, when and who was it with?​​​​​​​
Alex.
She was happy cause its her birthday tomorrow and I made cupcakes

Where ​is the next place​ you will travel to?
My bed, its about 6' away.


What were you doing​at 8:00 this morning?​​​​​​​
drinking coffee

What is something you currently want?​​​​​​​
a warm hairy man in my bed

What is something someone currently bought for you?
hmm.... I bought myself some LUSH... no one else buys me anything!

Are you going ​to have a good night?​​​​​​​
How the hell do I know?

Do you have strange dreams?​​​​​​​
I did last night, I dreamed that Smokey was on the evening news... talking about recycled paper products that burst into flame mysteriously.
ROFL

How long until​ your birthday?​​​​​​​
GO TO HELL

How many funerals have you been to in your lifetime?​​​​​​​
too many but theres one I'd like to attend... mwa hahahaha

Where​ was your default picture taken?
my countertop

So far, have you had a good day?
Me and the kids are still alive, so I guess it was all right.
:S

Last person you told a secret to?
Fred

Where​ were you at 4am?
somewhere in a field in Shropshire

Do you miss someone?​​​​​​​
Fred. After I told him my deep dark secret, he quit speaking to me.
:(

What are you doing ​later?​​​​​​​
that is between me, God, and ceiling cat.


What are you doing?​​​​​​​
wtf does it look like I am doing? you are not very bright are you.


What time did you go to sleep last night?​​​​​​​
930

Do you think​ that you're a good person?​​​​​​
until its time to not be good.


Is there​ a girl that knows​ every​ thing​ or mostl​y every​ thing​ about​ you?
she had to die, she knew too much

Have you ever regretted letting someone go?
yes Ramon...(Roger's brother) he drifted away on a warm summer breeze....

What are you excited for?
getting into bed and going to sleep... the only excitement I get is in my dreams

Has anyone ever mistaken you for someone else?​​​​​​​
ron howard

How much older are you than first​ person on your top?
23 yrs older... :P

Do you like messages or comments better?​​​​​​
All of the above, plus texts and voice messages

What are you listening to?
the air whistling between my ears

Did you have a dream last night?​​​​​​
YES DUH I already mentioned it.


What is the last thing ​you thought about?​​​​​​
Fuzzy Bear's Amazing Penis... rofl

sunday from hard head

How did you get one of your bad scars?
was dancing on top of a glass table.. couldnt sit down for weeks.


What was the last shot you got from the doctor?
tequila.
it loosens me up before my pap smear

Did you have any dreams last night?
yeah...Clive was awesome.


Is your room currently messy?
I can't see past all the boxes but I think its not too bad

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with D, T, S, or R
I can't be bothered trying to remember everyone I have kissed. But I am pretty sure their names all started with either a J or a P.


Do you have trophies?
yes

What trophies?
closest shaved

How about ribbons and metals?
yes

What kinds?
prettiest kitty

Did you ever ice skate before?
I slid on my ass..

How about cheerlead?
only in private

What about gymnastics?
I'm bendy

Or dance...?
when the mood strikes me... you've been warned.


What's your middle name?
Buttmuffin Lovin McNubbin

Kids
How much kids do you want?
I have a couple you can take off my hands, if you're interested.


What do you want your girls name to be?
Buttmuffin Jr.


What about boy?
Zeus, or Dante. something scary.


Cars
What's your future car?
a hybrid or a mini cooper

What car do you currently have?
a Honda Pilot SUV

Job
What do you want to be when your older?
independently wealthy and retired

Where do you work now?
I juggle kittens by the side of the road.
Feel free to donate, *points to basket*

Living arena
Where do you live now?
at home.

Buttmuffin Strikes Back Part 4

Buttmuffin Strikes Back Part 4
Current mood: adventurous
Category: Life

Jules , Belladonna,

Markus, Sue and Doug are stumbling back to the hotel room to drink some of Doug's Bitch Whiskey....

Ric is still following behind them, but the tattoo on the back of Doug's head is really freaking Ric out...

it appears to be watching him.

Suddenly Ric steps on a small tree limb which cracks with a loud noise...he ducks around the side of the motel quickly, but Doug's keen senses (or maybe his paranoia) alert him to the fact that they are being tailed. "Sue, you go on with them, I think someone's following us, and I am going to find whoever it is and kick their fuckin' ass."

Doug kisses Sue on the forehead and begins walking in Ric's direction

Ric wets himself.





Meanwhile, Chilli is out of the shower...

but he feels a bit peckish and thinks that it is time for a little something..

He stands there for an awfully long time, cause I like watching him with his shirt off. Finally he pulls out a few things (food, out of the fridge! Where is your mind?) and begins whipping up some spaghetti bolognese as he drinks his wine. God he is so talented.




Neale has written a few poems about roads, horizons and future happiness with loads of doughnuts. He takes a few pics of himself posing on his bed and uploads them to myspace...and he sees that he has another email from his friend Henrietta...


Dearest Neale,
I can see that you read my previous email. I do not like to be ignored. I suggest you reply to this email or else...
Love,
Henrietta

ps See attached video....

With great trepidation, Neale clicks on the link to the video.... what he sees before him on the screen is the most horrible thing he has ever witnessed and he lets out a high-pitched shriek.... (even louder than the shriek he let out the morning he discovered his first gray hair)




He quicky turns off the computer, grabs his weatherproof jacket and heads out the door to the nearest doughnut shop...



Chickwah is preparing for her date, and while she is putting her makeup on, she turns on the news...."this cunning criminal has a penchant for fine lingerie and seems to only nick knickers made of silk and lace from the most expensive shops...we have received several reports of thefts in and around London over the past few days, with no witnesses and no suspects at this time." Chickwah is really not pleased.


Meanwhile, Jason AKA Phil decides to go surprise his friend Mike on his birthday.




Stephen has given David the keys to the milk float, and off he goes to deliver dairy products....he feels a sense of excitement and optimism and believes that finally, after so many years of wandering the planet in search of happiness, he has found his true calling...





Rhoda senses the moon is nearly full and decides she is in the mood for a little walk in the forest...she likes to do this to clear her head, and also to perform little spells on the animals there


just for her own amusement...but she soon discovers that the woodland creatures are nowhere to be found....they have all seemingly disappeared overnight!
She becomes quite angry. "I'll find out who is responsible for this."

Elin's house is remarkably clean.



Back in America,
Sue, Markus, Jules and Belladonna have arrived back at the hotel room and they have sampled a bit of Doug's bitch whiskey....

"Markus, I know you're hot in that turtleneck, why don't you just *hic*...take it off..." says Jules, batting her eyelashes.
"Yeah it is kinda hot" he replies, pulling it over his head.
Jules' pupils grow large.

"Oh god yes" she whispers to herself.

Belladonna turns on some music and Sue begins showing the girls a few moves on the pole that has suddenly appeared in their hotel room.

Jules decides to join in the fun...

but then Belladonna pushes them both aside, "Let me show you how it's done, girls.."

She's such a showoff.

Doug enters the room, downs a shot of whiskey, and voices his approval..

"Honey, did you find that guy?" Sue asks.
"Yes, some weirdo, I beat the crap out of him."
"Cool."

"Markus how do you get your hair so perfect?" Belladonna asks him out of the blue... she loves to ask questions.
"Oh, hehe... the trick is to blowdry it in an upward manner, here... I'll show you."


The girls all stand back and watch him admiringly. Doug isn't amused.
Sirens can be heard in the distance...Doug peers out of the blinds, and tells Sue it's time to go. They take off.

Belladonna suddenly decides she wants to go for a walk and maybe go to Walmart and buy a new journal cause this is the most fun she's had in ages and she wants to remember it and maybe write a very meaningful poem.

Markus and Jules are alone...
Jules pretends that there is something caught in her eye that she cannot get out, and asks Markus for his help...(one of her tried and true seduction methods).
"Umm...the light is better over here, by the bed..." she says in a sultry voice...

"I don't see anything, Jules"
"LOOK HARDER" she says, grabbing his arms...


Ric, with a bloody nose and a black eye, crawls back to his room and places a glass to the wall... he can't believe what he's hearing...

"It's right there Markus, can't you pull it out?"
"I can't get it out, it must be stuck in there"
"Don't be afraid to just put your fingers right in there, Markus"
"Ok, but you let me know if I hurt you."
"Sure, just feel around in there a bit, maybe you can loosen it."

Ric throws the glass to the floor, shattering it...the vein on his head begins to throb.


myspace comments:

Jason AKA Phil	why don't u just dye your grey hairs and save Markus the hassle of plucking them?? Posted by Jason AKA Phil on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:03 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	WTF did you even read the story or just look at the pics :P Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:54 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Jason AKA Phil	i'm not like the local yokels yes i can read, if i can be arsed......... Posted by Jason AKA Phil on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 8:33 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Mark	Guys named Markus always get the girls. That does it! I'm changing my name. Very sensual Jules... This is getting good. Posted by Mark on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:07 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Markus	Hey Mark - absolutely the -us is essential for getting girls. Well... and it doesn't hurt if the Blog Mistress makes you look like Brad Pitt at 24 too. :>) Posted by Markus on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:51 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	You're way hotter than Brad Pitt any day :P Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:57 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Thanks Mark or should I say Markus? Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:55 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Jason AKA Phil	anyway i have been set up the man in pink underwear looks nothing like simon pegg!!!! here is the real Chickwah Knicker thief, he has opened his own shop with them... Posted by Jason AKA Phil on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:08 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	But you are a master of disguise...perhaps that is you! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:56 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	NE@LE	LOL i only take bed pics by popular demand........ where is the doughnut shop in your blog by the way..... i'm getting stressed trying to find it :p Posted by NE@LE on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:11 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	really? Who the hell demanded the bed pic then? You'll find one thats open soon enough, keep your feckin trousers on. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:57 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Pippa	Jules, are you SURE that the script is correct? You mentioned that Chilli was cooking and drinking wine at the same time....I didn't think that it was possible for men to multitask......lol! BTW LOVE the bare chested guys.....keep it up! (so to speak) ;-) Posted by Pippa on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:13 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Chilli is no ordinary man, you will soon find this out. ;-) Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:58 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	sue	OMG ROFLMAO. I can't wait till Doug read this later. This is getting good. I am gonna have to make Bitch Whiskey this weekend now. LOL Posted by sue on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:52 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Hehe I figured you guys would enjoy it :-) Feel free to post the recipe for everyone! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 2:59 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	sue	I will have Doug post it. I don't know where he put the reciepe. LOL. Posted by sue on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 3:05 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Stephen	I want to know more about David aka Pat Mustard,and where are all the hairy babies? Posted by Stephen on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 3:50 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LMAO give him a chance he just started! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 3:54 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Paul	my god...that tatoo on the back of dougs head is freaking me out too Posted by Paul on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 7:58 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	I didn't make that up either, that is really the back of my friend Doug's head LOL Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 6:16 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	BellaDonna	Some of us are just gifted. What can I say? Posted by BellaDonna on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 9:25 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Lorraine	Hey Donna, when you come over to England, Pippa and I will show you our version of pole dancing. Not quite as sexy but hoping that Chilli or Neale will wear their lederhosen and liven it up a tad-xx- Posted by Lorraine on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:44 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Pippa	News travels fast....here come the guys and bearing a very, very long pole...... Posted by Pippa on October 13, 2008 - Monday 1:16 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	BellaDonna	Ah, liking the thoughts of Chilli in a state of undress... Neale can recite something sexy, perhaps--or keep Jules happy.... Posted by BellaDonna on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 2:06 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Lorraine	Whilst being generally amusing with a box of donuts maybe-xx- Posted by Lorraine on October 13, 2008 - Monday 12:34 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	That is like porn to neale. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 5:05 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Simon Truebrit	The plot is developing nicely and you still haven't let on what's in Ric's box! Keeping us all in suspense, tune in for the next episode folks!! Posted by Simon Truebrit on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 10:09 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Hey I try. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 6:15 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Thin Client Engine	Hehehee...this is hillarious... Is Doug a cyclops of sorts, then?? only to be tricked into submission?? or into s and m?? (saturday and monday) And the hotel room with poles appearing outta nowhere-no, not THAT kinda pole!! jeeez!! enjoyed, J... Posted by Thin Client Engine on October 11, 2008 - Saturday 10:49 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Hmmm well not sure if he has to be tricked but Sue did say that he's been holding out on her. LMAO Yes well in the first movie, it was revealed that Donna is a witch....shes got magical powers ;P And she was drunk and wanted to show off...whats new! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 6:18 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	BellaDonna	...but I'm only using my powers for good these days.... unless provoked! ;) ha ha ha Posted by BellaDonna on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 2:04 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	*pokes Donna* Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 5:04 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	BellaDonna	I'm glad somebody is poking Donna! It's about time! Posted by BellaDonna on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 4:21 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LMFAO Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 4:26 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Chickwah	Dammit, Chilli even looks hot with a towel on his head! I do hope you find the Chickwah Knicker Nicker soon because my drawers are almost empty, so to speak!!!!! Posted by Chickwah on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 1:34 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LMAO how else do you think he got that nickname??? His extreme hotness!! Still going commando?? :P Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 6:19 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Jason AKA Phil	i think i found the missing knickers.... Chickwahs are to the right, jules are to the left...lol Posted by Jason AKA Phil on October 13, 2008 - Monday 7:22 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	I opt for comfort over fashion. Hey at least no one steals mine. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 13, 2008 - Monday 7:27 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	BellaDonna	Look! The ones on the left are crotchless! OMG! They are Jules'! ;) Posted by BellaDonna on October 13, 2008 - Monday 10:55 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Easy access is the key. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 5:06 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	dawnmarie~creative writer~	hahahahahah i want him to come over here and check my eyes out too !!!! Posted by dawnmarie~creative writer~ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 4:41 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Haha LOL Hey you have got him in real life, Angelina, don't be so greedY! :p Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 6:21 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	julie ~ fan of dmb	Don't you think it's about time for a juicy sex scene? ;P Posted by julie ~ fan of dmb on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 7:30 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	hahaha I usually save the best ones for dream sequences...cause such is my life. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 7:32 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Tracy	LMFAO!! Peckish???? My retinas are scarred...David and the milk float. yucky.... Love your imagination, dear! Posted by Tracy on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 11:45 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LOL thanks :P Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 11:46 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Rhoda Whitehorse	Oh Im late! Ive been so busy frolicking with the woodland animals tra la tra la.... la la la.... frolic frolic *TRIP* WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Where have all the woodland animals gone? I am all alone.... *SOB* Im very impressed with Donnas pole dancing... how I wish I could do that... and upside down too... and I agree with Julie... I think we need a red hot sex scene next time... its all far too clean and pure around here... we need heaving bosoms and swinging appendages... Im waiting. -x-x- Posted by Rhoda Whitehorse on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:22 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LOL... Me too but I'd probably get injured. its hardly pure. :P Everyone needs to chill out and be patient...!! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:37 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Markus	Yikes ! It's still hot in here. Ya know you've gotta love a hotel room equipped for pole dancing. That really get's the party going! But I must say, Donna turned into kinduv an "odd" drunk with the whole Wal-Mart thang. Now poor sweetie has a boo in her eye - hmmm... why can't I see it? ;>) Posted by Markus on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:48 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

♥buttmuffin♥

That's what I always say! Yeah Donna gets inspired to write poetry at odd times. :P I dont know maybe you need to get closer...damn. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 12:53 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

laDonna	Jules chased off her best friend Bella So she could be alone with a cute fella. “Write a poem,” she said, “While we have fun in bed!” But they took long enough for a novella. Posted by BellaDonna on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 2:33 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	ROFLMAOOOOOOOOO Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 12, 2008 - Sunday 2:44 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Lorraine	David looks a tad serious driving his milk float. How about a cheerful makeover? This sprang to mind-xx- Posted by Lorraine on October 13, 2008 - Monday 5:14 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Pippa	Lorraine, remind David not to park his van out in the hot sun, though..... Posted by Pippa on October 13, 2008 - Monday 1:11 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Lorraine	Oh dear, and there was me thinking that the Ghostbusters zapped him-xx- Posted by Lorraine on October 13, 2008 - Monday 2:02 PM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	I must work this into the plot. Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 5:07 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	*******Fillip****************	Loved it But I do think we ought to keep this pole dancing a more family affair Philip xx Its dancers from Poland right? Posted by *******Fillip**************** on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 12:15 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	Now you want polish dancers AND Lederhosen....this is getting tricky Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 5:08 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Chilli	Lmao, I really liked it up until the very last bit .. smashing a glass .. that's just wrong ! Where will he pour his alcohol, he really is a villain. P.S. That Sue's an agile girl eh ?! Posted by Chilli on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 10:12 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	♥buttmuffin♥	LMFAO. yes she is! Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 14, 2008 - Tuesday 10:17 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

	Archer	This is just too cute and clever! Posted by Archer on October 17, 2008 - Friday 7:53 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]

♥buttmuffin♥

Better watch out, once I get to know you, you will be incorporated into the movie..either this one or the next :P Posted by ♥buttmuffin♥ on October 17, 2008 - Friday 8:16 AM [Remove] [Reply to this]